Molly's Cronicles: Talent Sho
by iloveHairyOMG99
Summary: Molley and Hairy have adventures and find out wat too do for the Talent Sho! Who will fall in love? Who will die? Pleese read cuz I'm working relly hard on it! Better than sumarry! no h8!
1. 1 - A Normel Day

(Serious AN: Some people have been writing reviews about how they're going to report this, and how I should take it down, and how authors like me don't belong on . If they're serious, then that's pretty ridiculous. Just because you don't like something doesn't mean it deserves to be taken down from a website. I haven't written anything purposefully offensive, and I actually put a lot of time and thought into these stories. You can hate them, of course, since that's your opinion, but it's pretty bad if people aren't allowed to express themselves in a certain way only because some people don't like it. This is actually why I'd really like it if made a trollfic tag. You could say in a drop-down that you don't want to see any of them, but if you were only browsing with no parameters you wouldn't see the tag.

TL;DR: Calm down, please realize I work hard on these crappy stories, and try to get to make a trollfic tag!)

(AN: k guys anyon who reeds this da story is for my friens's birthday and about her so no hatin or maybe shell take it like a insult. K.))

Molly streches her arms an yawns as she gets out of bed. _My hare is so perfec in the morning_, she thinks, brushing it. she takes her wand and efforetlessy casts _Maccigly Clotheus_ and her cloths appear on her body. She doesn't need to wear robes cuz Dumbledore is her dad (AN: ya shes adopted mayb in da next chaper ill put flashbaks) and he does everything 4 her (but only if she gose to the store 4 him and gets his volumizing beard oil lol his beard hair isn't helthy).

"Hi Mollty," Hairy says as she sits across from him, where Herminey would sit but Molley killd her lol.

"Hi Hairy, hi Stupid," Mollty responds, laffing at Ron. Hairy joins in and Ron doesn't notice tho cuz he's eating britsh food. Hes a fatty.

"So were u gonna join the Talent Sho?" asks Hairy, licking som majic wizard orange jouce (it's not really majic but everyone thinks it is cuz Dubledor said so lol).

"I dunno, maybe, I don't know what 2 do for it," she replies.

"But u are so perfec!"

"O thx Hairy," she says, faltered. "But I still don't kno what to do for it."

"U can com up with something. Mmm this majic orange jouce is so good."

"Hairy, it's not majic," says Mollty fabulusly and smartly, "my dad Dubledore lied. It's cuz hes insecure about his beard hair."

"Wat dose majic jouse have 2 do with beard hare?" Hairy ass. _It's a good thing hes the chosen 1, _Mollet thinks.

"Ur kinda stupid… Anywayz, I don't know but im always right, and Ron is fat, so." Molyl smartly quips.

"Lol your right Mole."

"i kno."

* * *

That nite, Mollty was in the Gryffidor common room wif Hairy thinkin off things to do 4 the Talent Sho. Ron was eatin at the Grate Hall all alone lol.

"Maybe I can-WOAAH!" It was like an eathquake shook the Hogwarts Catsle. Mollet looked out da window and saw a grate beast...A DRAGON!?1/?!

Hairy used as spell 2 get down to da dragon. He knewd it was comin for him. But Mollye know different. she knew it was 4 her and her battle.

"No hairy!" she yelld, then casted the same spell to teleport too. Wen she dgot down ther, Hairy was tryin to cast majics at it and kill it.

"Moove out of the way! I can kill it wif my majics, perfecness, and awesom curly hair!"she shouts. Hairy dives out of the way of her majic and perfecness and curly hair.

"But Mole, how are u gonna use those seprete things?!" he exclames! rolling so not to get hurt frum the rocks on da ground.

"Silly, Im gonna use them toogether! _Peraciate Curlonomus!"_ She casted the spell at her hare and suddenly all the affects hppend. Her hare flasheded all colours like a crazey fireworks show kinda-ish. And her hare also becamed rock hard like metal (AN: ya i know metal isnt a rock but just go wif it ok?), but her nec was strong enouf that it didint hurt her.

Molley charged at de dragon, hed down.

"RAAAAAWR," goes da dragon (named Ron (AN: lol geddit cuz ron sux everything thats bad is calld ron.)) as it breaths fire at her. Hairy helps her out by casting a spell calld _Ron-es Tonto _(AN: lol anotha ron joke) at Molley to shield her frum da fire.

Mollye went "RAAAAAAAWR" back at da dragon and hedbutted him in the belly. Then his guts esploded bloodily all over everywere. Like all off britin.. But Hairy did anothe spell that sheilded him and Molley and another that poofed Ron into the esplosion. So Ron got coverd wile Hairy and mOLLY WERE OK AND ALL HAPPY CUZ THEY KILLD DA DRAGON. But mainly Mole killed it with her awesom majic hair that all da Hogwarts wanted.

"im so prod of u," Dubledore said oldly and wisely at da grate hall. Hairy an Molley wer standing nex to him by te standy thing (AN: opium?). "I say ten millon pointz 2 Giffindor!" he yelld to every1. Malfo slammed his head on da table, givin himslef an concussion. His Slither friends didnt notic cuz they wer eatin. he leend over 2 Molley and Hairy (Ron wuz still in da outside eatin dragon gutz.) and wsperd: "Lol now gryfindoor will win 4sho!" (AN: ya Dubledoor is cool and stuf.)

Then grifindoor had a relly fun party wifout Ron to celebreat the 2 heros.

(AN: thx fo reading! see u nex chaptr!)

AN frum ch 5: (AN: guys thanks for revewing but its not a joke ok? Even if it wus it wudn't too make peple angry it wudn't be making fun of peple. Mayb it wud be because it mite be fun too let go and rite a bunch of crap instead of trying relly relly hard. Not like not try at all but still. I don't like making peple angry I like to make peple laff so it wud be to rite a terrible funy story. I'm not trying too make peple angry. So think about that pleese befor you revew.)


	2. 2 - Dreems and Luve

(AN: thanks u guys for the reviewz!But guys, if u dont have anything nice to keep your stupid comments in your pocket and go away to a rabbit hole (I made that up myself!). my friend really loved it so haha guys who were haterz u were wrong! I am gonna try to make this chapter better with the spelling but sorry if i mess up cuz I'm bad at editing :PPPPP And also I do kno how to spell stuff like know, reviews, and becuse but i like to spell them like that cuz i think it makes the look cooler :DDD Also i like putin authors notes alot cuz sometimes they help give u guys more info and they help esplain sometimes. Also, sorry for not posting a chapter in a wile, but i'll try to write this more ok!)

_"Molly!" shouted Hairy, desprately grabbing on to the evil dragon's spine things you know that come out of its back like super pointy things so he wouldn't fall to his splatty death. Moley was even higher above him, somehow floating!then she realized her dad's beard was curled around her._

_"Dad!" Moley said loudly. "Where r we? And what is Hairy doing with that dragon? Does he even love me anymore?!/1/?"_

_"Oh Molly," her dad Dubledore says wisely, "Maybe." She was super shocked at her dad, kinda!_

_"Whatever dad," Moley says angrily. putting her arms crossed. "I still wanna save him so can u use your beard or majic or whatever?"_

_"Okay, but pleaze remember to go for an oil run this time," Dubledore says like an cool bearded calender._

_"I kno okay! Just help Hairy!" Somehow he still grabbed on to the spike things, luckily. Dubledore pointed his majic wand at Hairy and said 'wingardi Leviosa!' Dead Herminey floats by and is so dumb she even trys to correct the famos __**DUBLEDORE **__on his talking._

_"Its wingardi leviOHsa not W-"_

_Moley takes her wand and casts an spell at Dead-miney loudly, like "Dead-miney killionenia!" And then a big anvil falls from the sky and hits Dead-Miney. she esploded with an icky noise and everyone laffed._

_"Molly," calls levitating Hairy. "Molly!"_

Moley wakes up with a jumpy feeling. "Moley?" asks Hairy, helping her sit up slowly.

"Hmm? Oh hi Ha-"

"*nom* Oh sorry, Moo-Moo," says Ron really meanly, even using a nickname that Moley really super hated. She scowled at him, but he kept eating. "*swallow* I hit you wif a turkey leg. This one acsually. Hahaha," he said then took a bite of meat. Ya he's mean _and_ fat.

"He knocked you out super cold. I was worried a lot, kind of," esplained Hairy.

"Cold...like ice creeeeem!" shouted Ron in bad taste (like rotten foods y'know). Everyone looked at him with angry in their irises (AN:thats the colour part of the eyeball :D ya i learned that a few years ago in science1!)but Ron didn't see. He never sees cuz he always is eating stuff and right now he was eating the turkey leg.

"But improtantly, do u know what your gonna do for the Talent Sho?" Hairy asked.

"No, but we were trying to figure it out remember last night when the dragon appeard?"

"Oh yeah, so maybe we should go back to the Commen room," said Hairy in a reply.

"Ok." Molly didn't kno why, but she got nervus about going to the commen Room with Hairy suddenly, like she wasnt before..

"By by Ron, more like fatty," Hairy said, like 'ooh burn' someone might say to what he said. Or they might say to Ron 'hey need ice for youre smoothy?' Wait no that's not write i think. Sorry just ignore that last thingy i made in the story about smoothys.

Moley laffed nervusly, and played with her hair cuz she was nervus right and she stood up and went with Hiary to the Commen Room.

page break

"Hairy, i dont think this is goin to work out?" said Molly with a question sound kinda in her voice. She was balancing a bunch of books on her head like a cool gymnastics person. "Hairy i'm gonna fall over! Aaah!" She screamed a bit as she fell down to the Commen Room floor but it was a nice scream not one of the ones where it hurts your ears to listen to (so it wasnt like Hermine's lol she's so really annoying.).

"I got u!" said Hairy loudly, nicely and chivalrily (AN: its like knights and stuff). He runs over and caches her in his arms. Moley looks up at him romantically kinda and he looks back and smils.

"Is this what love feels like?" whispers Molly, still lookin into Hairy's grassy green eyes. Moley loves grass cuz it tickles here feet.

"Maybe," Hiary says in a reply with a grin. _Yeah its lucky he's the chosen one,_ thinks Moley again. But she only kinda cares how dum he is. She reaches up and raps her arms around Hairys neck, pulling herself up to standing on her feet. They look into each others eyes and see love and stuff. And also reflections and the iris and pupil and sclera. But alot of love. They slowly lean in, closing there eyes. There lips near each others when Ron bursts in, enormus stomac first.

"Oh hi guys, hahaha," he says , totaly ruining the moment for them. The two romancers turn back to eachother and smile.

"Wanna beat him up?" asks Moley sedutively?

"Of corse."

Then they run at Ron really fastly, and pumble him with their romanticly linked fists. Their love-connected feet crush his ribs, that peirce his lungs. At long lastly, they stop hitting Ron the Fatty and stair again into eachother's eyes. There bodies move closer and finally there lips meet in love for the first time. They break apart and Moley says, "I love you so much."

Hairy says back romanticly, "I love you too."

Ron groans in pain behind them, barely conshus.


	3. 3 - Bloming Romance and Dyeing Fires

(AN: ya it gets a bit sexy/gross (cuz it's Ron and Ded-miney) but it's not really that bad like no grapefruit or whatever the hell the thing is called. Ya, so I'm getting more mature with my writing as you can read/see (like I used some swear words and there's making out :O) Also, I said keep your stupid comments in your pockets! To those people, you can fall of the earth (like that's a promise ok)! So I'm gonna post reminders thruout this chapter about stupid comments? But too the not mean people, enjoy!)

It was nighttime and dark in the infirmery. Ron could not really see anything that well. He tried to sleep but it was really hard for him, cuz the nurse lady put him on a diet after seeing how terrible he ate. Actully, she was just starving him cuz she was really not wanting to deal with that fat idiot's hunger so he was really hungry and craving a chicen leg but everyone was gone (cuz like i said before the nurse wich left cuz she was bored and stuff right?) so he layed in his bed all tired but to hungry too sleep. He closed his eyes to dream about chicen smothred in lard.

_Mmm_ he said in his head. He kept dreaming until he heard somone (or somTHING?!) make a noise like a sneeze maybe. His eyes popped out of his head. No wait poped open. (AN: sorry lol my bad rite? haha i bet i'd love to see that anyways cuz he'd be like "AAUUUUUUUUGH WHERES MYEYES NOW HOW AM I GONNA LOOK FOR FOOD NOW HOW WILL I LOOK AT THE LARD ON DA CHICEN? GAWWD THIS HURTS ALSO A BIT?") He looked around the room for the thing with the allergies problem.

(AN: keep your stupid comment in your pockets)

"W-w-w-whe-e-e-e-re a-are yo-o-ou?" he said scaredly as chills went all throuh his brain or pointer finger or whatever the saying is. Suddenly a girl slowly walked up too him from the dark.

"Herminey?"he asked surprisedly and shockedly.

"That's me," she said, sitting down on a chair next to his hospital bed.

"Ded-miney? I thouht you were dead? Like that's why we called you Ded-miney! Right!" Hermine-not-ded stood up and smacked him.

"I hate that name it's dumb!" But Ron kinda licked it (the slap i mean). He didn't know why but maybe he did cuz honestly he might be smarter that Hairy like in the sexy departments I know that's probably wrong but still like maybe. Like hyper-patheticly kind of Greek Phil-awesophy kinda stuff right (that has too do with Pluto or whatever?)? Not-ded-miney smirked sexily (AN: to Ron it was at least lol she's not sexy at all amirite?) as she leaned in closely to Ron. He gasped at how close she was too him cuz he never had a girlfriend before, only Scabbers. Not-ded-miney cutlassed his cheek lightly and then she kissed him. Ron was kinda wondering if she was a corpse and if it's wrong to have the hot-sauces for a dead person, but he thouht about it and decided that "What the hell corpses are like the closest thing I'll ever get to a date." and so he made out with Not-but-maybe-ded-miney and it got weird cuz she hit his broken rib by accident but he kinda liked it like the slap. But Maybe-ded-miney was into that messed up stuff to so it was okay.

(AN: keep your stupid comments in your pockets)

"Herminey!" bursted Dreco sexily at Clearly-a-cheater-miney. Total-bitch-miney broke the kiss into a bunch of tiny peices (AN: that was a metepwhore ok?) and Ron gasped at Dreco. Like Bitchminey was on top of Ron likeit was a bad thing for anyone too see. Ew.

"Dreco!" said Bitchminey suddenly. "I'm really sorry my slithery dragon!" Ron, even thoh he is like really gross, gags at the nasty pet name. Why not Bingo or Spots or something but whatever. Bitchminey jumps of of the bed and runs to Dreco who forgives her.

"I forgive you." said Dreco, hugging his gross girlfriend. As they hugged Bitchminey gave a look to Ron. It said "I hope you don't care I was cheting on him with you. I love you too kinda." But her eyes were lying cuz she didn't love Ron, she just was atracted to fat guys like Ron... She also licked actully sexy boys like Dreco but he wasn't fat so she was gonna be Hanna Monterey and get the best of both galaxeys (AN: i don't know the name of it but ihop you'll get the refrence soooorry! Also keep stupid comments in your pocket) "But you!" he pointed his sexy finger at Ron! "You suck." with those two words Dreco winked at Ron and Ron was like "He's kinda hot." Dreco's sexyness can seduce anyone cuz it's from the Devil! The Devil gave him ultimate sexy powers but first he had to kill 200 maidens and offer there blood and flesh too the Devil but he's hot so who cares lol.

"I'll see you later," said Dreco seductly at Ron then he walked away with Bitchminey who really wasn't dead like for sure but she still was stupid and gross and ugly.

* * *

Meanwhile, Moley and Hairy where on a date.

"So I said, 'Voldemort, calm down ok? You don't have to be evil anymore' and then he stopped being evil." Moley laughed at Hairy's incredible story.

"You're amazing," she complemented him.

"But you... are perfect," said Hairy truthly.

"Your right," replied Molly nicely.

"Waiter, more Butterbeer for the really super nice and fine lady!" said Hairy in like a call kinda. The scruffy waiter came over too the table and brought a new mug off Butterbeer.

"Thanks Haggid," said Molly nicely. She had asked Haggid if they could have a date there and he said 'of course' probably cuz she's the best and she killed a dragon and she also has great hare. "But Hairy, what about the talent sho?" she asked.

"Well, I had a grate idea, we-" Suddenly a loud "ROOOOOOOOOOAR" was herd kinda like the dragon's roar but more girl sounding.

"Ded-miney!" exclamed Moley and then she went running out the door with Hairy and Haggid.

When they got to the infermary (Moley used her really good ears to track the noise) Herminey was in the middle of the room and on fire like a burning marshmellow I guess. "I thouht you were all dead and stuff?" said Moley askedly and confusedly.

"No," said Fire-miney with an evil grin. "I made a deal _WITH THE DEVIL_! AAAUUUUUUUGH!" She was transforming in the fire and getting larger and musclier like a demon on steriods or something? I don't kno sorry :P

"How'd she get on the fires?" asked Hairy stupidly kinda.

Ron looked like a fat sheep. "We, uh, where trying something, er-"

"Nevermind," said Hairy interruptedly. Even he got the sicking, gross, pukey idea.

"GRRRRAAAAAAAAAH!" Demon-miney said boomingly in a deep voice. "I. WILL. KILL. **_EVERYONE!_**" She put fire out of her hands like an esplosion at the ceiling and she's still on fire to.

"Ron, Dreco, I have to kill her," says Moley smartly and wisely like her dad but no beard cuz like that wuld be ew. The two guys nod and Dreco goes over to Ron and whispers in his ear and Ron blushes then they hold hands. So I guess noone actually liked Herminey lol makes sense cuz she was really bitchly. Molly runs up to Demon-miney and stabs her in the eyeball with her wand. It pokes her brain and she stops shooting fire and bieng on fire and falls over. Then Hairy leans over and grabs her head in his hands. He puts a foot on her shoulder and pulls hard on her head. It pops off and some blood splatters like a happy red confeti cannon.

"Let's play Quiditch!" he says yelly and happily, holding up actually Ded-miney's head. People cheer and run into the room saying happily, "Quiditch, Quiditch!" Then everyone gose to play Quiditch (even Haggid) and Moley holds Hairy's hand romanticly as they walk to the feild. But Ron and Dreco stay behind.

"So..." Ron says startly, but Dreco puts a sexy finger on his lips to silence him. Then he kisses him and pokes his broken rib romanticly. The two make out and stuff but it's confusing what to think cuz ones hot and ones fat and nasty. So like I don't know right now but whatever it's just I don't know.

(AN: so this was sexy/ew so ya. Next chaptre is gonna be sad ok? ok byee :D)


	4. 4 - Deth and Majic

(AN: this chapter is relly important so dont skip over it ok? thx 4 reading! 3 3)

Snap walked down the hallway stompingly. He was super mad, relly very mad, even. His faverite student, messed up by that ugly fatty Weesly. Snap caught Dreco talking to Weesly during potuns and so he took the Weesly's pot thing and slammed it on Ron's head. The potun went all over Ron's shitty robes (like I mean acshully covered in poo) and made Ron cry. What an moron.

"Snap my darling," said Snap, making the spinning circle stairs open. He went up them and came into Dubledore's office.

"Hi, my severed sweety," said Dubledore romanticly (AN: ya I know its gross sorry guys it has too happen) but wisely at the same time cuz he was Dubledore .

"Hello," Snap said emoly and groandly like that's what his voice is you know?

"Bad day? Was it that Weasely boy? He's dumb."

"Yes. He's coreupted Dreco in to an stupid idiot. I think we shuld kill him."

"Yes of course," said Dubledore happyly and smartly, "but killing is no fun unless you make it a game, my sweet gingersnap. How about an bet?"

Snap grinned evilly but still depressdly. "Deal."

* * *

"Hahahahaha,' laffed Moley at Hairy's joke. Her and Hairy and Ron and Dreco walk a-long the hallway telling jokes and chating.

"So Moley" say Ron, "what do you think about da new wizard." A new wizard came to Hockwards that day and was their in class.

"LOL" Moley says (AN: like relly she gose the letters like ell oh ell) "shes like a noob,"

"I like it wen you talk like a enternet person." said Hairy happyly.

"Thanks. But she thinks she's so cool but im the only cool one in Hockwards! Like what, is this amatur our!"

"Oh my god Moley you make so many cool geek references!" bursted out Hairy like an big projecktile vomit. But not grossly just relly fast.

"i know rite Hairy! Also she always gets relly good grades and only me gets to get relly good grades! She's so mean."

"Anyway what will you do for the Talent Ho" says Ron questonly?

"I dont relly know, like maybe-"

"_**A vahduh kedobra!**_" Casts an wizard and an big strong green majic gose at Ron and gets hit. Ron flys thru the air becuze of the curse and lands on the ground and gose "Oof!" Dreco sees the wizard run away.

Dreco Milfoy desides to find the wizard later so he runs over to his boyfrend along with Hairy and Molly. "Oh my god he's breething?" He says. Molly looks suprisedly at Ron who is breething.

"What! How!' she asks questonly and curiusly.

Ron moves an little bit on the floor and says "i ate somthing i found in my bowl of luky charms...i think it was an reel luky charm."

"O thank god. You guys shud take him to the infermery.' says Dreco to Moley sexily and bossily. (AN: if you dont get the sexily reed the before chapter of this.) He turns a round and remembers were the wizard whent. _This way_, he thout as he went that way.

* * *

Dubledore walked happyly and laffingly over to Snap's teeching room.

'Hahahaha" he laffed smartly and jollyly like Santa Claws! "He's dead my Snap so pay me!" Snap looked angryly and emoly at Dubledore but then laffed.

'Here," he said Snap-ly when he handed Duble the money. Wen he leaned in to give Dubledore the money, Duble snuck in an kiss. Snap kinda litely slapped him you know like teesingly.

"Why don't we have an little vodka poton too celebrate!" said Dubledore askingly. Snap nodded and went over to his desk and opened an droor. He got an bottle of vodka poton and two shot glasses and filed them up and gave one to Dubledore.

"Too killing Ron!" cheered Snap but in an kinda emo way cuz really Snap is always emo.

"Too-" Suddenly the door bursted open with an big "bang" noise!

"How dare you Dubledore! You tried too kill Ron!" yelled Dreco!

"Err..."

"What do you mean, 'tried"?" asked Snap.

"Headmasker Dubledore casted A Vahduh Kedobra at Ron but he ate somthing that protected him," said Dreco esplainedly. "So how about I try it on you Dubledore!"

* * *

Moley and Hairy helped Ron in to a infermery bed slowly. "Ok I'll go get the healy lady," said Moley helpfully as she walked off to find the lady. Hairy noticed somthing on Ron's face.

"Hey there's somthing on your face. Like your forhead." Ron spread his hair away frum his face so Hairy coud see. Hairy gasps.

"You have a scar like me but not really like me cuz I'm important and the chosen one and your not. Also the shape is diffrent. But whatever." They waited for a bit and Ron put his hair back like it was. Fineally Moley came back with the heeling lady and Hairy and Moley left too find where Dreco went too.

"Let's find where Dreco went of too." said Moley. And they went.

* * *

"Dreco, as Headmasker I-" Dreco was a bad boy so he didn't relly care about Dubledore bieng headmasker.

"_**A vahduh kedobra!**_" Green majic came from Dreco's wand and shot out at Dubledore!

"No!" yelled Snap like not emo for once! and he grabbed Dubledore in time too pull him away as he casted _loversio kedobra_ and it spun the end of the majic around and pointed it at Dreco then it hit him and he went flying thru the air, dead. And Snap and Dubledore fell over cuz Dubledore kinda accidently pushed Snap over cuz he caut him.

"You saved me." said Dubledore relly smartly, knowing the facts. His head was in Snaps lap (not like it broke of or whatever it was still on.)

"I could never let a nother wizards wand touch you, my love." said Snap romanticly and with a happyish kinda face. But then it went back to emo but super emo. "But I have too kill you. Dreco was my faverite student and now you killed him. I'm sorry my love." Snap pointed his wand at Dubledore;s forhead and wispered '_A vahduh kedobra._" And Dubledore died.

The door slamed open again! This time Moley and Hairy where comin in.

"My dad!" yelled Molly sadly and angryly.

'What did you do Snap?' said Hairy yelly and askingly.

"I have nothing left now. Me and Dubley can be together if I go," says Snap emoly while looking at Dubledore's face and ignoring Moley and Hairy. "_A vahduh kedobra,_" he says quietly, pointing his wand at his head. Snap's wand falls frum his hand and hits the floor write when his corpse dose.

"Oh god." Molly says as she walks slowly to al the dead peple. "Dad." She kneels down and crys for a bit. She takes the wand from his pocket and holds it. "This is the Elder Wand," she says, eggsamining it. "To bad its not mine." Suddenly Dubledore wakes up and cofs.

"Moley, dear, can you he-"

"_**A vahduh kedobra!**_" she casts, putting the majic to Dubledore, actully killing him for good. "Hehehehehe," she says laffingly. "Now its mine!"

"But Moley isnt that like evil and stuff too kill your dad?" asks Hairy stupidly.

"Good thing your the chosen one," she says quietly. "Normaly yes, but I'm perfec t so its okay."

"Ohh..." says Hairy trailingly. "That makes sense."

"But I cant help thinking i killed everyone here." she said. "Like I'm evil bad luck demon."

"No, no your not," esplained Hairy. 'Youre perfect. But i know the real evil bad luck demon. Let's go."

**MINETS LATER**

"Your evil!" screams Moley, pointing. "You killed so many peple, you evil, cruel ginger! I hate you, Ron Weasely!"

"W-what di-di-did I do?" Moley stomped up to his bed and Hairy followed behind her.

She slapped his face relly relly hard. "So I gess you dont know." Ron shook his fat, retarded head. "Then let me tell you" Moley talked growlly and fearcely. "You killed my father Dumbledore;" Ron gasped (probbly a fake one tho, thought Moley.). "Snap, and..." Moley leaned in right next too his ear. "...**Dreco**." Ron started crying like a relly fat baby.

"How did _I_ do that?" he asked stupidly, still crying.

"My dad and Snap made an bet about who culd kill you first, and then my dad allmost one. But then you're boyfriend tried to kill my dad and Snap had too kill him. Then he got depressd and killed my dad and himself."

"H-how did you know all that?"

"Don't queston me you retard!" she yelled. "But it has too do with the Elder Wand."

"Oi, youre probbly a lier! I didnt do not'in'!"

"Oh shut up," burst in Hairy. "shut up you chav."

"OI I WONT SHUT UP!"

"Well then, _**A vah-**_" Molly went up to Hairy and kissed him on da lips.

"I wasn't sure if you wud stop otherwize." she said.

"But why not kill him." asked Hairy.

"Oh, its a good thing your the chosen one," said Moley. "If we keep him alive he'll suffer mor." Hairy grined and kissed Moley.

"Let's go, we're gonna have to tell somone about all this and figure out the fyunrals."

"Ok. but I shoud've known he was evil. Did you see that scar?"

"Ya," said Hairy. "A swasticka."

(AN: hope you licked! :D next chapter is sad with fyunrals and flashbacs and stuff! plz leve a reviewwww! 3)


	5. 5 - Fyunrals and Picpocets

"Deerly be-loved we are here today for a fyuneral for this dead man in the coffin thing." sed the preest man. Moley started crying at the relly sad and pretty words and teers came out of her eyebals.

"Abus Dubledore was the Headmasker of Hockwards for a wile and he was smart and old and had a relly relly long beerd that was long but Dubledore was kinda con-trolling and stuff. So now he dyed." Hairy put his arm around Moley as they watched the priest por gas-o-leen on Duble thru teers on there eyes. then he lit a match and put in on the coffin. Hot yellowy fire came up from the wood and it didnt smell very good cuz there wuz a dead guy geting birned to ashes in it. After it was all birned the preest guy got a shovel and put the little grey bits of birnt into a jar and gave it to Moley. Then the fyunral was over and so Mrs. McGoggal came over to Hairy and Moley.

"Your the new headmasker i mean headmatress cuz your a girl." said Goggal to Moley kinda sadly u know cuz it was a fyunral.

"Oh thats cool?" she said happily cuz she didnt relly care anymor about the birnt peices of her dad in the jar cuz now she was hedmatress!

"Your the first headmatress who is not even graduated yet so thats cool." said now happyly cuz Moley's smile made evryone happy cuz thats her other power like hair powers and also smile powers to!

"That is so cool wy dont we get a buterbeer?" said Hairy happyly.

"Ok," said Moley.

"Ok." said Mrs. McGoggal. 'But i bet i can out drink you two!"

"Ok lets make a bet!" said Hairy.

"Ok." said Moley!flower bambi

"Ok." said Goggal! So they went to the place were u get buterbeer.

"Ok!" they all said at the egsact same time!

flower bambi

There were alot of empty mugs on the table.

"Haha," sed Moley laffingly. "You r the coolst teecher ever at Hockwards!"

"I know!" sed Mrs. McGogall loudly and happyly as she started chuging another buterbeer.

"Guys r we gonna get relly fat cuz off all the buter in buterbeer?" sed Hairy dumly.

"Its a good thing ur the chosen one!" sed Gogall and Moley at the same time. Then they laffed.

"Hahaahhahaha" they laffed.

'Ok!" sed Hairy. And he drank another relly big buterbeer like it was a extra large size or somthing like that.

At the end of the nite, Hairy and Moley were kinda harldy awake.

"Shoo." said Hairy drunkly at nothing.

"Doo-wop" said Moley drunkly at nothing.

"Well I'm going back to Hockwards. Gimme ur money tomorow." sed Mrs. McGogall as she casted _teleportionus Hockwards _and disapeered.

"BLEEEEUEUHGH" went Hairy as all his buterbeer came out thru his mouth in a big progectile barf and it went at Moley.

"Stopis barfis" sed Moley perfectly as she made the barf go around her but even tho it didnt get on her she was still grosed out. 'Im grosed out." she sed, grosed out. "And so im braking up with u cuz i dont date guys who barf k bye." And Moley did the telleport spell and went to the comen room.

Back at the place were u get buterbeer Hairy passed out. A shadowy guy sneeked up and picpoceted his walet and his glases and his robes so Hairy was like all nakid in his underweres.

* * *

The next morning Hairy woke up.

"I'm only in me underweres." he sed, knoing the facts. "But i keep my wand in me underweres so ok." then he casted _teleportionus Hockwards._

"Ooh Hairy," went Moley. They were in the comen room. "ur in your underweres. U wer picpoceted weren't you?"

"How did u kno! Also we r broken up still?"

"No cuz i like a guy who has underweres so its ok. Also don't cueston me, it has too do with the elder wand." she esplaned. "But we hav to find who picpoceted u! Let's go too the room that changes and stuff cuz i bet the persons ther." So they went to the room that changes too find the picpoceter.

Moley opened the door to the changy room and she went in relly sneekily. Hairy folowed behind her just as sneekily.

"Look" she sed relly wispery, pointing at a figyure hiden in the shadows. "Dose he look familier?"

Hairy shook his hed. "No, but I meen I cant really tell cuz like he's all hidden in the shadows."

"Let's knock him out." ses Moley as she creeps up to the guy. "_**A vadah kedobra!**_" Green majic shoots out of the wand and kills the guy so he falls to the floor cuz he's ded u kno? Moley pulls him out of the shadows and they see his face.

"Dreco?!" they esclame shockedly.

"But how?" ses Hairy dumly.

"Good thing ur the chosen one," Moley muters.

"Wat dose that even meen? Like how am I the chosen one?"

"_Don't question me!_" Moley yells smartly. "I know u r cuz of the _elder wand! _anyway he sold his sole to like the devil remembre? So his sexy powers also make him never relly die i gess." Then Dreco sudenly woke up.

"R u the picpocet!?" sed Hairy. "Did u leeve me in me underweres?" Dreco rubbed his head and sat up.

"Ya I'm wereing ur robes cant u tell?" he said sexily and askingly.

"_U WILL DIE 4 TAKING HAIRY'S ROBES AND WALLET AND GLASSES U BICH_!" said Moley relly screemly and angryly and yelly. She wus relly fed up with Dreco's bulshit. "HARE POWERS ACTIVATE!" And her hares went relly big and then hardend into relly hard like metal.

"Hehehe" laffed Dreco sexily and teesingly. "U can't kill me!"

"ILL SEE ABOUT THAT!" rored Moley as she ran backwerds then charged fastly at the undyeing Dreco Milfoy. "_DIEEEEE!_"


	6. ANOUNCEMENT!

This is a very speshul anouncment! Theyre is a thing calld NANORIMO or somthing it happens in november and u rite 50000 words in a month and im gonna do Molly's Cronicles: The Novl! So look for that in november ok? Also I mite not update so very much cuz I have scool now :P Byeeee!


	7. 6 - Mistery and Marige

(AN: guys thanks for revewing but its not a joke ok? Even if it wus it wudn't too make peple angry it wudn't be making fun of peple. Mayb it wud be because it mite be fun too let go and rite a bunch of crap instead of trying relly relly hard. Not like not try at all but still. I don't like making peple angry I like to make peple laff so it wud be too rite a terrible funy story. I'm not trying too make peple angry. So think about that pleese befor you revew.)

(AN: and also im geting beter at riting so ya my first chapter is kinda bad. I kno it.)

"DIEEEEEE" shouted Moley as she ran relly fast toward Dreco who was snarking. Her hard metal hares smashed in to his belly and he esploded. His ded body flew backwerds and smashed in to a wall. "See I was rite I can kill you!" she yelled at the ded esploded Dreco. But his picpocety guts floaded bac too his body and went in to his c z avitys (like chest and nasall cavitys). His skins atached toogether and Dreco stood up all heeled.

"No." he sed. "You were rong!" And he swung his punch at Moley's hed. But she doged it and wipped out the elder wand and pointed it at Dreco.

"A VADA KEDOBRA!" she casted and she hoped it wud kill him for good. And becus she is the Moley herself it did kill him for good.

"No you killed me for good!" he screamed as he died from da green majic. Hairy walked up too Moley and huged her from behind.

"You killed him for good." he sed romanticly in her eer.

"Yep" she sed bac too him knowing the facts like her ded smart dad. "Maybe I cud do that for the Talent Sho…. Now lets find your robs that Dreco picpoceted."

PAG BRAKE

Ron was relly bored in the infermery. He was relly sad to. Ron was ok, but wen he left and somone saw his scar they beet him up relly bad. It was relly funny and a lot of peeple laffed but then the heely lady came out and sed "Oi you dum kids I'll kedobra you lot oi!" She sed it like that cuz there scotish or watever rite. And all the beet-upers ran away too class. Then wen everyone was gone the lady kiked Ron in the fat belly.

So Ron had a bad day. His boyfrend was ded everywon hates him and cuz of the scar he cudn't enter the Talent Sho. He looked over too his wand on the bedside table.

"Hmm" he sed he grabbed the wand. With sad in his eyeballs he took a deep breth and sed...

"A vada kedobra." Normaly with all other spels Ron The Fatty cudn't make them. But mayb fate wanted him ded, cuz the green majic came out and went on Ron. And so Ron Weesely killed himself after so much hate and animostity was put on him his hole live.

"Oi my bloody god oi!" Went the heely nurse wich wen she walked in to the room. It smeled like ded body. "Oi no, no, no." Ron's body was lying on the bed, ded and stuff. The heely lady imediately ran away too tell Abus.

* * *

"Abus, Abus!" yelled the heely wich as she came in to the Hedmatress's office.

"My dad is ded." Replied Moley. "I am Hedmatress." The nurse was embraced about the huge mistake.

"I'm really sorry Hedmatress Moley Dubledore I've made a huge mistake. But I found a ded body. It was that one kid you know the ginger one..."

"Ron Weesely?" Asked Moley smartly.

"Yes he's ded! I think he killed himself cuz there was a wand in his hand and there were no woonds on him."

"Ok let's go, come on Hairy." sed Moley, grabing Hairy's hand.

As they went too the infermery, Moley asked som qwestons.

"So wuy wud he kill himself?" She asked, even tho she alredy knew. Moley just wanted too see what the heely lady thot.

"I think it was cuz som kids beet him up real bad oi." The nurse put on a poker face cuz she thot she was wuy Ron killed himself (she was rite tho, it was her falt.) "Where here Hedmatress."

Moley gaged as they went in the room. She was fake gaging cuz she acshully liked the smel but both Hairy and Nurse gaged so she did to.

"Ther he is, wat do i call you?" sed the Nurse.

"Call me Moley," she sed back nicely. Like some peple wud make you call them Ms. Hedmatress Dubledore but Moley was so relly cool and nice. Sudenly a girl like Moley's age came in (like 17 everyon's like 17 in this story ok?). She had a trenchcote and her cool hair was flowing wen she woked.

"Hi I'm Alexandra DeParcucio." sed the perfect girl. "I'm a relly smart detective and I'm here too solve the case of the ded ginger guy."

Everyon gasped but not Moley...she just made a relly rude bichy frown. (AN: like sorry Moley-URL I know ur not relly rude or a bich but its just in the story you are kinda. Ok sorry!) Moley didn't like Alexandra but also litle did she know Alexandra didn't like her ither! "So wat hapened here?" Alexandra sed smartly - even smartlyer than Moley can be.

"He kild himself." sed the Nurse. Alexandra went over too the ded body.

"Ya he killd himself I can tell. It was with the A vada curse."

"How'd you know smarty-pants?" sed Moley meenly.

"The skin turns lite green wen u die frum it like the same color as the majic. So I gess this case is closed. I need to go now so-"

"Wait!" sed Mc Gogall brusting in to the room relly cooly. "She neds to stay! She is old enof to be here and with bieng so smart she cud be top off the class!"

"Well if you want me here I'll stay!" said Alexandra cooly and smart and awesomly! Moley frownd agen. She hatted the new girl and she even notised Hairy looking at her with lovey eyes.

"If u want to do the Talent Sho then I can help you." sed Hairy looking at Alexandra with lovey eyes cuz Alexandra is so relly pretty and just like so good. Moley hit him.

"You love me not her rite?" she sed romaticly, tuching his face. He helded his bruse.

"Oi not anymor, u hit me way to much." Then Hairy turned to Alexandra sexily. "Alexandra will u merry me?"

Alexandra looked relly suprised. But she smiled relly big. "Of corse I will!" They went toward eech other and kissed. Moley's frown went relly big.

"I'LL DO RELLY GOOD AT THE TALENT SHO AND YOULL COME BACK TOO ME!"" she sed loudly and screamly as she stormed out of the room.

"Well…." sed Hairy, "Lets get marride."


	8. 7 - Evil Potons and Love Majic

(AN: sorry for not updating but I was kinda buzy with scool a bit. But here's the big conluson! And for Moley I made you bad in the last chapter but now I'm the relly bad guy! So its ok now.)

"Like she just came in and now Hairy dosen't like me anymor!" Moley sed. "I don't know wat too do Dad. There geting married!" Moley's Dads ashes didn't say anything cuz there ashes. But Moley snaped that day after loosing her boyfriend to a sudenly there lady. She snaped rite in halve.

"Moley, you need to win him over by doing somthing specal." sed Duble-ded's ashes (not relly thogh). "See wat Alexandra dose and then do somthing better then her."

"Thanks dad. I won't let you down." In Moley's depresingly broken hed, her dad wanted her too marry Hairy. So she'd do it no matter wat.

* * *

Hairy lied tired in bed with Alexandira late at nite. They were in there specal house that they got builded on the scool grounds.

"You were so good" she sed truthly. Hairy smiled.

"I know. I've ben doing it since I was eleven."

"Wow Hairy! I didn't even know you did Quidich for so relly long!"

Over in a closet Moley scowled. She was wating for a relly long time and had to be togh on herself to not jump out and strangl Alexandra. She watched as Alexandra got up perfectly from the bed.

"Want som majic orange jouce Hairy?" He noded and she went out of the bedroom to get the jouce.

Back in the closet Moley was relly not trusty of Alexandra. So she quietly opened the closet and crawled out of the room to follow Alex. She crawled down the hallway to the kichen, right behind Alexandra. As Alex opened the frige to get the jouce, she looked around for peepers. Moley douve back and hid rite in time. She peeked around the wall and saw Alex holding somthing not orange majic jouce!

"Love poton." sed Moley to herself with an angry frown. "She's evil!" But then Alexandra started back over to the bedroom. "Oh no she's coming back to the bedroom!" Moley sed knowing the facs. She quicly casted Invisino Mequeifa on herself and crawled back too the closet.

"Here you go Hairy." sed Alexandra, handing him the evil love poton. He drank it down relly quick. And he burped to.

"Good thing your the chosen one." sed Moley quiet too herself, trying to not kill Alexandra becuse she stol her Hairy. Relly fastly the poton did the thingy.

"NO I LOVE MOLEY!" Hairy sudenly shouted as he waggled around relly bigly and crazy! "I-I LOVE... I love..." Hairy calmed down but in a relly creepy way. His eyeball pupil hole got super big and his body went calmerly. "I love you Alexandra." She laffed evily and cackley.

"I love you too Hairy. But you shuld probly get to sleep now if were gonna get marride tomorow." He yawned and fell asleep like relly fast. But then Alexandra turned around evily to the closet.

"Don't try to hide anymor Moley" she spitted. Like relly she went "Heuuughh pthoo" and spat flem at the closet. Then she slowly went over to the hiding place as she sed things. "You can never ever ever ever take Hairy back. I have the love poton and as soon as we get merride the poton is super permanet. It's merrige majic you know. But actully you don't know cuz your not smart at all Moley. You never noticed anything until its to late! Now Hairy is mine forever! But I'll give you a chance tomorow but like your gonna stop me. That is after I beat you up and dump you in the Forbiden Forset."

Alexandra riped open the door and dumped a buket of cloroform on Moley. It knoced her out frozen.

* * *

Moley's hed hurt and she smeled like cloroform. "Were am I" she thogt? "Oh rite the- OH NO IM IN THE FORBIDEN FOREST!" Even thogh she was like all dirty and cloroformy she still cud know the facts. Moley got up slowly and looked around.

"Who do I ask to know wich way too go? Wait I hav a map maybe!" Moley reeched in her back pocket and pulled out the Maraders Map that she got from her Birthday from Hairy. It sed Hockwards was that way so she starded that way.

After only like five minutes Moley knew it was kinda bad. Her hed was relly sore and she noticed blood was coming of her forhed. She found a nice leef and stuck it on her cut and it seemed to work like a nature bandade. But her legs were relly sore. And Moley knew she had to be at the weding by the complayts part or it wood be all over! Lucky thogh she asked the map for wat time it was and it sed it was half an our to the merrige. So Moley even thogh her legs hert she kept going and went faster. This wasn't even becuz her broken hed, she just relly loved Hairy and needed to save him.

* * *

Back at the house, Alexandra woke up from a nice sleep. She was happy and relly reddy for the wedding plan to go thru. She opened her eyes to see- _an empty bed other than herslef! _"Hairy!" she sed loud. "Hairy-" then she saw him out of the window running away to the Forbiden Forest! "Oh no you don't my sweet!" she sed evily. She hopped out of the window and on to the grass to follow Hairy.

Meanwile Hairy was trying to make a big escape. Wen he woke up (only a few minutes before Alex,) the poton was warren of and she had forgoten to tie him up. So he had quickly left... but not quick enogh! Hairy knew who his reel love was, Moley, and he had a dream of her being cloroformed and put in the forest. Like this wasn't relly a dream but he herd the plans wen he was sleeping so his brain made a dream of it. Now he was going to find his reel true love!

* * *

Moley was so close to the not forest part of Hockwards. It was not even soon enogh tho, her legs were relly brusey and she almost passed out before. But then she saw it... the feild! And then she saw Hairy coming rite too her!

"**_Hairy! Oh my god Hairy!_**" she yelled, love majic like relly heeling her leg woonds so she culd run fastly!

"Moley!" Hairy yelled back! "Oh, I-"

Moley stopped ded in her tracks, totaly shocked like litening hit her in the brain peice that controls movment.

Hairy felt somthing poke thru him. Like thru his eternal orgens. Majic chosen one blood started too come out. "Moley!" he sed, falling to the ground with a speer in his belly.

Alexandra walked up to Hairy, laffing evily. "Oh, sorry honey," she sed sarcasticly. "It was an accident." She kicked him in the face, making blood spray all over like a sad, depressing founten.

"**_MOVE, BICH, GET OUT THE WAY!_**" screamed Moley from the botom off her lungs as she charged forward. Her hair turned medal like before, but this was totaly diffrent. The power of true love was going in to her and it charged her like a super majic wizard chosen-one baterry. Alexandra didn't lisen and stood by Hairy, rasing her wand.

"A vad-**_AAAAAUGH!"_** Moley's hed came in to contact with Alexandra's body, and the power of love did things. It slowed down time for Alexandra, making her die relly badly and slowly and painly but for Moley it was only a split second wen she esploded. Her evil guts flew everywere like that one time in reel life wen they esploded an wale and peices went all over! but it was a person not a wale.

But Moley didn't have time to think about wales. She needed to go to Hairy. So she went over to Hairy.

"Hairy..." she sed cryingly. "I'll help you, I relly promise. Like on my dad's ded beard I promise." And Hairy was still alive so he sed "I love you Moley. And you better get help." So Moley stood up and casted Acsio Nurse-lady, but nothing hapened exept her wand made an boop noise like a mac wen somthing dosen't work. "But why?" she sed.

Hairy wispered, "cuz evryone's at the Talent Sho." Moley's face went realizey and angry.

"But now how will I help you?" she sed as she sat down and leened over Hairy.

"You... you can do it..." he sed, and he closed his eyes.

"No Hairy! If thers one thing I lerned from Hockwards its that dying peple cant close there eyes! or the'll die!" She couldn't hold her teers in her eyeballs anymor so she just cryed all over Hairy. As she sobed, her eye water started to glow a pretty colour. "W-what? Do I have a diseese?" And she cryed mor cuz she thoght she had a eye diseese.

But then love majic hapened agen! The pretty colours went over Hairy and then he coffed.

"I'm heeled!" he sed, patting his stomack! "I'm heeled and I'm alive!"

"How?" For one time Moley didn't actully have the facs!

"It's a good thing your also a chosen one" Hairy sed quietly. "But you were chosen to heel me I gess so were both chosen ones!" Moley wiped of a majic tear and ate it wen Hairy wasn't looking, and then they hugged.

* * *

"So..." sed Hairy, admiring Moley's and his rings, "What shood we do now? We missed the Talent Sho, got marride, and had a Honymoon." Moley thought for a bit.

"I sined a paper as Hedmatress for the Basebol Club to start..." she sed, sugestingly and helply.

"Well then," Hairy sed "Basebol it is."

**CONTINUED IN THE NEXT STORY: "Molly's Cronicles: Basebol Game!"**

**(**AN: this was so much fun too rite! Now that this's over were one step closer to riting a novel for Nanorimo! I can't wait for mor revews and i hope too see you over reeding my next story! Thanks for reeding!**)**


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